my narcissitic ex also it is addicted to porn and on line dating sites, he lied to me also about it and he cant not accepted, but I know his addiction to porn, also he had been trying to always find his perfetct match but never find it, I had been hurt so many times, and he promissed me to change and all that, same thing we got engaged and after 3 weeks living together he started locking himself on the computer room and getting so mad and defensive when I questioned what he was doing there I turned back to my hometown and I hope to never hear from him again. I have been away from him for 8 months and going strong ! Such a great post everything you said, just happened and by me googling my question and your website coming up with this article. That is, the feelings are being projected outwardly onto other people or things. I am that woman you just described.mine has lost the best friend and love he could have possibly ever had in his life, I still miss him, think of him all day despite hes giving me the silent treatment and I just dont know why I am still thinking of him even though hes been treating me like crap. Over the years I have always felt that I was living with a schizophrenic. Whether the narcissist will return after you institute no contact is the most pressing concern, at least initially. To pull me back in. This only added fuel to the fire . So maybe there is a planet that beemed these people to us to learn to go through life with a lot less trust and appreciate a good man / woman when we finally do seek a non alien partner. Oh my gosh!!! All he had in him for me was contempt and rage!! I had been dating (not sleeping with) several guys, just playing the field. Right there I cut him off. Knew what a NPD was until just now. Well he never saw our son until he was 8 months old. why do they talk about exs so much and compare you to them? A few months later, Ju told me that her relationship with her partner is over and she will be loyal to me I felt somewhere that it was my fault and was abit sad. They see him clearly now. "I bought my own homeall by my damn self! Going silent with them lets them know youre not a viable source of supply. We lasted two years and he doesnt think Im gone I am gone! I couldnt function, or make sense of life or what had happened between us. Everything was so perfect and good between us. One, he had a restraining order against. Please do everything you can to go no contact. She said I cant see you be destroyed like this. TMI and he never told me about that or her. Dont let them sneak back in after no contact has succeeded. She knew everything about me and at first, literally flowered me.. made me feel so special and wanted. H gave up so much for her. Translation: a woman he is prepared to tell me about. They're in it to win it. HELP! My god. Those in narcissistic rivalry, on the other hand, tended to view their ex-partners especially negatively. Check out her Narc Abuse Recovery Program. It is not making my current girlfriend happy as well. She told him he was a pathetic piece of Shit, that he was just calling her because he wanted me back & I was the best thing he ever hadyada yada yada. Narcissists can hover for months or years. I had no idea he was mad! And I find out he has adds on sex sites and apps and has been screwing around more trying to groom Some one to move to the next. I am SUPER STRONG NOW so he thrives on the negative contact. Remember, narcissists only care about winning and getting what they want. Whether this is done with love bombing, insults, or pleas for a second chance. I lost many friends. And see so many messages sexual talking to men about how he wants to have sex with them. When I reacted to him playing this terrible mind game, he was eerily calm. And they still waby you to live with them? I have been able to sort through a lot of truth and I take responsibility for my part in this and I am working to be a better me. until a friend of mine Walt Pen told me about a spell caster who helped him in the same problem too. Are you sure he dumped you (or that you dumped him)? All i can say now is thanks to Dr.KATE, if you need any help from him contact him with this email omozokpialovetemple@outlook.com, he is a very powerful spell caster. Breaking Up With A Narcissist. We spent years and years brainwashed into believing it was all about them and our needs being neglected. Her connection with that son has actually grown stronger as a result of our separation. By the grace of god I went to college for 12 years and have a great career .i let him back in our lives 6 years ago as he convinced me he had found god. Your email address will not be published. I have totally broken it off with her as well as divorced I even had to leave the church we attended due to her in-laws by her youngest son Also attending there; the manipulation was very easy for her there as I had openly testified as to the things that I had experienced in my lifetime ! I cried for the first weeks and have been angry for the last. I was so distraught. I never asked anything from him. Find a therapist who understands narcissism, blame another person for a mutually caused failure, respond to social rejection with outsized anger and aggression, Narcissistic Admiration and Rivalry Concept, narcissistic individuals vary in the extent to which they are high in both of these dimensions, narcissistic rivalry is associated with poorer interactions, experience more anger when they have conflicts with romantic partners, Easy Ways to Tell Whether Youre an Inadvertent Narcissist, perceive their current partners positively, Playing Favorites Gives a Narcissistic Co-Parent Control, Why Extremists and Hate Groups Often Play the Victim, "The Menu" and the Narcissism of High-End Dining. Youre most valuable to them after youve put your life back together. I didnt want to see the truth. You would be nothing without them. Thanks for this realization. I am not proud of my outbursts, but why am I this horrible, terrible person, and hes the victim! This article confirms everything I believe. The relationship started off amazing thought I was so lucky to have found this person. A narcissist never ever changes. Im assuming theyre still together, does this mean hell leave me along? he came knocking on my door one night and I called 911. The "Real Housewives of Orange County" star, 58, announced Wednesday that she was . Things have been very rough for the last few months with me and my girlfriend. Im Mentally & physically broken down. Look for single moms clubs or make one for yourself and build your friends group. He has tried to contact me a few times, nothing dramatic, nothing sad or heartfelt. If you think that she wont change, do you feel as though I should become a narcissist? I discovered that he was on dating sites. She realized that it was her dad. We talk about lot of scientific and pseudo classifications in terms of narcissist-sociopathic inflictions , however we often fail to introspect. And before I knew it he asked to move In with me. I am also hoping to have a real relationship was a loving woman who can understand that I am not perfect nor is she and that we will grow and forgive one another ! 32 years of hell. Tried to be ridiculously pragmatic about me moving out and diving up the things ( didnt want to discuss anything about the relationship, just bills, details). Jus they out. After easter, my son hurts himself and I rushed him to hospital. He start to tell. I said : okay, be well. He right the way started to calling me pets names like sweet heart and babe. She has also lost her daughter and sister, what a terrible tragedy in life for her. narc are extremely low in everything. I was shocked at this but have since read many counts of others going through the exact same thing. Sometimes I even think that I probably should for the sake of keeping the family together go back to her. He would then treat me like a dog with no tolerance, no compassion or help with anything. I am so so proud of myself and know rhat I deserve a true happy love life one with respect. Ive been reading up on articles such as, making sense out of a very strange relationship. continue your good work the great spell caster. He was engaged when we met & I had no idea. Weve gone through this a few times and now that he lives here it makes it a million times harder to get him out. I am very catholic, however I noticed many things about him that were alarming. He starts screaming at me to take him home. 1.) Narcissists dont have a timetable, they only have alternate sources of supply. Then he start writing me. If you have to meet with him in person, take a family member or friend who you trust with you and even record conversations, if need be. Hes doing it again to me !! Read read read makes us smarter and stronger. Especially if you've begun to see through the facade and are longer blind to the obvious. He has put me down so much, and destroyed my peace. No, anything good in him, was for sure a lie, a fake.It would disappear soon after you spent a little time with him.It just made me think, how he must have been putting on a show, after I left himrunning my name down. Severing the lines of communication leaves the narcissist with fewer options for controlling you. com, he offered a great help to me. She told me that the only thing she got from him was an abortionwhoa! So very thankful that other men responded to this with regaurds to women who are narcissist ! I suspect this guy is not just a Narcissist but a Sociopath. he even tried to have me put in a mental hospital, by the judge! com . Hes trying to make me look irrational and insane in front of everyone. He worked as a fraud investigator and told me he had to go undercover with NICB and we had to get a divorce but it wasnt real. So. He is a bit put off by women. still shes still asking for more. let your ex play whatever game he can dont fall for the manipulation the love bombing co parent and if he refusing make sure you have it all on writing do not go back! He may go 3 days without contacting me and then expect me to answer and I dont, I send everything to voicemail, he blocked me on social media when all this started but since I left, has been upset that I wont accept his friend request, so he attempts to call me through the internet. As always, this depends on a number of factors. You can do this! Teenage love. Have read all your posts and is helping me understand more and more After 22 year marriage and then divorce, saw my first love high school sweetheart. Really, for anyone out there experiencing the same thing and finding it hard, thinkif they are so happy in themselves and with their lives and the new fantastic girlfriend why are they still getting in touch with you. Keep on with the NC strictly. My last 2 relationships we had an understanding we were partners it was just certain things that we didnt agree on and parted ways amicable. I was a widow and he strolled into my life manipulating me for nearly a year. Rather than tell me some texts were making him mad. And then I feel sad. Because I am a strong willed person & when I didnt agree with them the argument would always esculate to where they would end the relationship. Thanks! I dont know the word I can use to describe this powerful spell caster DOCTOR SANU but I bet you dont want to miss this spell casters help, he is such a blessing to earth. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC. In all cases though, the narcissist needs supply and they need to repair their ego (even if its at your expense). I was scared to cut his contact because of his accusations of me not wanting him to see her which is false despite everything I do wish he does step up for her however Ill still run game in a way to protect whats right. And it is hard, but so necessary as I saw him gettun g worse and worse. This wont go on forever. Weeks. Im living proof of it. A narcissist will certainly say they regret losing you. Yes. What are the chances of this relationship being real and lasting and what are the chances of him trying to come back? Nope. And I start to find out about the cheating more and more. Also, realize if this man is truly as manipulative as youve mentioned that he WILL NOT be victorious when the deal goes down because thats evil working through him. Options for controlling you compassion or help with anything & # x27 ; ve begun to see the... Sake of keeping the family together go back to her several guys, just the! And he never told me that the only thing she got from him was abortionwhoa., literally flowered me.. made me feel so special and narcissist happy after break up they about... Sure he dumped you ( or that you dumped him ) hurts himself and I start to find about. 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